My nams is Baraa Assaf and I am a mother of four.
I did not give birth in a hospital but in a house with a midwife. It was difficult at the time because there was daily control of the women, in the streets by the Daesh. I personally was not very much afraid even if I was alone but mostly for my kids that had to stay alone in the house. So, I told my kids not to be afraid and that I would return home with a baby. My family saw my daughter after four months. When she was born I was crying out of happiness but also because I was alone. With the rest of my children I had the chance to visit a hospital. With my daughter I wasn't able either to take any medicine or visit any hospital.
I left from Syria when my daughter was in her eighth month. When we first left Syria we went by car to Araka and from there to Tel Abyad where we stayed only for one day. The next day we walked to Orfa. It was so difficult because we walked for twelve hours through a river and the water was up to my knee. My daughter fell twice from my arms because I couldn't carry her. I was carrying her throughout the whole trip. My other kids were besides me together with my husband.
The most difficult times for me were in Macedonia. We walked for seven days in the forest from the borders up to Hungary. One day her heart stopped when we were near the borders with Hungary. Her face was blue and she had closed her eyes. I was crying and shouting to my husband for help. I lost my life in this moment. But a man saw us took us in his car and drove us to a hotel. My shoulders were in so much pain because my husband had to take care of our other three children. My feet were bleeding and I was only able to breastfeed my baby this whole time.
When she grows up I will describe everything to her because this journey was also very difficult for me.
She didn't have anything compare to my other three children. I think this child is more special than the other three because she had a very difficult beginning.