My name is Fatima and I am 21 years old.
I gave birth in the hospital of Orfa, but I wished to remain pregnant and that I never had to go to this hospital because it was very bad and difficult. I was hit by the nurses and doctors during labor. When I gave birth, I lost my mind for a long time because of this torture. They tied my hands and feet and made me sit on my stomach.
Now I am very happy that my birth is over. I got pregnant again in Turkey but I chose to have an abortion because I didn't want to give birth there again. After this incident I got pregnant again. And I wanted to have an abortion for the second time but my parents insisted to keep it and that they would help me get out of Turkey. That was the most important thing for me.
After I gave birth to my baby boy, I didn’t see him. Because I was hit a lot from the doctors I fainted, so they cut me from below and took my baby out. I was also very tired. After that, they took him away from me, for one week because he had a problem. I didn't see him once nor lactated him.
I imagined my life differently. That I would have a house and that I would have children without any disturbance or any torture and that I would be living peacefully. I can see my parents my friends my family my children.
I'm afraid to think (my life in Germany), because I've been hearing many things about the children the schools and the life there. Everything is different from the labs and the schools that we have in Syria. In Germany everything is the opposite from the things that we have learned in Syria and the things that we teach to our children. I want to raise my children the same way that my parents raised me.